Friday, July 08, 2005

Shut Your Pie Hole

We all knew it was coming, and it's no real suprise that Bill O'Reilly, the pillar of right wing moral virtue, was the first to do it. In one fell swoop O'Reilly called most Europeans idiots and used the tragedy of the London bombings to ramp up the rhetoric for the Iraq War:
Generally speaking, the European media is viciously anti-American when it comes to the war on terror. The garbage these people are throwing out to a largely clueless public is astounding. Failed leaders like Chirac in France and Schroeder in Germany also pound home the anti-American theme to divert attention away from their own disastrous administrations.
Okay, fine Bill, you're entitled to your own opinion but the following is inexcusable:
If all of the anti-U.S. bitterness were redirected into anti- terror bitterness, the world might defeat these savages. We all know which major countries allow terrorists to operate. Iran, Syria, Saudi Arabia, and to a lesser extent, Pakistan and Indonesia. Why isn't the European press condemning those countries? Why doesn't Europe admit Saddam's regime helped terrorists all day long? Why won't the world help the struggling democracy in Iraq?
I have just a few points of rebuttle you narrow-minded ignorant dickhead.
(1) You point your righteous little finger at several countries who apparently harbor terrorists. Fine. The world powers should do whatever is in their collective power to dissuade those nations from aiding and abetting international terrorists. BUT, I somehow doubt Bush/Cheney/Rove/Rummy/Condi would go into Saudi Arabia with the same vehemency as the other countries you mentioned. They damn well should, but most certainly won't.
(2) You suggest that Saddam's regime helped terrorists 'all day long'. Point well taken, and I suppose that is SOME reason for going balls out into Iraq. It's just too bad that wasn't the justification you used (read down to the 3nd paragraph). By the way where are those WMDs again?
(3) To link what happened in London with the so-called 'struggling democracy in Iraq' is, at the very least, irresponsible, and at the most despicable. How the hell are those two things connected? Do you think, for one second, that if Iraqi democracy no longer struggled and was set firmly in place, the terrorist attacks would suddenly stop? To suggest that the root cause of international terrorism has something to do with the 'world' (I think you mean Europe) not helping solidify a political process in Iraq is ridiculous.
(4) And finally, I thought I'd share your closing words of wisdom which are oh so enlightened:
USA is not the problem in this world. The terrorists are. And if you don't agree with that, you are helping killers like al Zarqawi. Enough's enough. London should be the last straw. And that's “The Memo.” - FOX News
Terrorists are most certainly a problem but the U.S. isn't close to perfect and if you ever come out of your Ivory Tower maybe you'd see that. In a world that is defined by its shades of grey, speaking in absolutes is very scary.

Triatheletes Taste Like Chicken

Um....yeah....I don't really know what to say about this one:

Triathlon competitors are to be insured for £1m in case they are injured by the Loch Ness monster...NIG's David Parker said: "From an insurance perspective, this is a very unusual risk and a lot of insurers wouldn't want to deal with it. "We're providing up to £1m of cover in case any competitor sustains injuries that can be proven to be the result of an attack by the Loch Ness monster."

And the event's organizer has this to say:

"These competitors will all be very psyched up and very driven so there's going to be a lot of noise and a lot of splashing going on - just the sort of thing that might annoy a prehistoric lake monster. Or even worse, it might give it an appetite." - BBC News

How can anyone possibly argue with such sound logic?

Thursday, July 07, 2005

Cowardice Knows No Bounds

A few admirable quotations which draw a distinct and very necessary line between most Muslims and the few cowardly fanatics who attacked London:

"We know that these people act in the name of Islam but we also know that the vast and overwhelming majority of Muslims both here and abroad are decent and law abiding people who abhor this kind of terrorism every bit as much as we do," - Tony Blair

"This criminal attack is condemned in the strongest possible terms. No good purpose can be achieved by such an indiscriminate and cruel use of terror. The scriptures and the traditions of both the Muslim and Christian communities repudiate the use of such violence. Religious precepts cannot be used to justify such crimes, which are completely contrary to our teaching and practice." - Muslim Council of Britain (as posted on their website)

The following is an excerpt from a statement made on an Islamist Website. The previously unknown Secret Organisation Group of al-Qaeda of Jihad Organisation in Europe has claimed responsibility for the attack:
"In the name of God, the merciful, the compassionate, may peace be upon the cheerful one and undaunted fighter, Prophet Muhammad, God's peace be upon him...The heroic mujahideen have carried out a blessed raid in London. Britain is now burning with fear, terror and panic in its northern, southern, eastern, and western quarters."
Peaceful? Heroic? Hardly. I think Dr. Laurence Buckman, who happened to be on scene at the Bus explosion outside the headquarters of the British Medical Association summed it up:
"Whoever they are I don't think it takes great bravery to blow up large numbers of people on London Transport. None of these [injured] people have taken up arms against them or done them any harm."

When In Doubt Steal From Morrisey

Admittedly (and tragically), the headline is appropriate but you'd think the revered staff at Ottawa's numero uno right wing radio station could've come up with a better headline than the first line of a Smiths song (click on link for bigger pic).

A Nice Pantsuit Can Only Do So Much

I know they always tell you to dress nice for court, but looking respectable (for once) wasn't enough to get Lil' Kim out of big-time trouble (seen above on left in court attire, on right in cheap hooker attire):
Lil' Kim was sentenced Wednesday to a year and a day in prison and fined $50,000 for lying to a federal grand jury to protect friends involved in a 2001 shootout outside a Manhattan radio station. -

Wednesday, July 06, 2005

Live Skank

For the greater good Anna Nicole Smith made an executive desicion to heighten Live 8's coked-up plasticised skank factor.

VP's Evil Empire

In yet another stunning conflict of interest the U.S. Army just awarded a huge, and seemingly inflated, contract to Halliburton:

The Army has ordered nearly $5 billion in work from Halliburton Co. to provide logistics support to U.S. troops in Iraq over the next year, $1 billion above what the Army paid for similar services the previous year. - Washington Post

I don't think it's unreasonable to suggest that there is unholy connection between Halliburton, it's subsidiary KBR, and the current administration. According to The New Yorker, Vice President Dick Cheney raked in a whopping 44 million dollars as chief executive of Halliburton. Despite stating that:

“I have absolutely no influence of, involvement of, knowledge of in any way, shape, or form of contracts led by the Corps of Engineers or anybody else in the federal government.”

Cheney IS still involved when the cash starts to flow:

...he continues to collect deferred compensation worth approximately a hundred and fifty thousand dollars a year, and he retains stock options worth more than eighteen million dollars. - The New Yorker

I'm assuming that if the value of the company increases, based, I don't know... let's say a 5 billion dollar contract, the value of his stock probably increases. I think it's important to remember that Halliburton has some experience with 'kickbacks'. It's too bad we can't fire a VP.

Tuesday, July 05, 2005

Crazy Like A Fox

As the Cruise Missile repeatedly goes coo coo for cocoapuffs on national television, interest in his...*ahem..."religion" seems to be skyrocketing:
Since he declared his eternal love for Katie Holmes in early May, visits to the Church’s official website have shot up 263 percent to a peak of 375,000 visitors per day last week, according to site traffic tracker alexa. A lot of those visitors must have come through Google, which listed “Scientology” as the 10th-fastest-gaining query for the week of June 27. -

It's All About Priorities

P-Diddy, Puff Daddy, Scruffy, whatever the hell he's called, proves that true class has nothing to do with drinking Cristal (seen above swaddled in endangered animals):
Hip-hop mogul SEAN 'P DIDDY' COMBS has apologized for failing to turn up to his scheduled performance at the Philadelphia Live 8 concert - because he was reportedly too busy shopping. The rapper was set to join DESTINY'S CHILD, DAVE MATTHEWS BAND, ALICIA KEYS, STEVIE WONDER and the BLACK EYED PEAS at the star-studded event outside the Pennsylvania city's Museum of Art, but was a no-show. - DOSE

Monday, July 04, 2005

Homolka Released!

News flash - Karla Homolka was released from prison today:

She was spirited past squads of reporters and photographers outside the prison without being seen. Her release was confirmed on Monday afternoon by the correctional Service of Canada and a lawyer representing the families of her victims. Corrections officials didn't say how she was whisked away, leaving outsiders to guess which of many vehicles that left the prison she might have been in. -

12 years in prison doesn't seem like nearly enough for torturing and killing 3 people. A deal with the devil indeed.

Liberals Worse than Al Qaeda: Robertson

Progressive and moderate Christian groups have finally started to take a stand against the Evangelicals who seem to be running the show in the US:

"We can no longer stand by and watch people speak hatred, division, war and greed in the name of our faith," said Patrick Mrotek, founder of the new Christian Alliance for Progress. "We must reclaim our faith." - Yahoo/AFP

The groups are really pissed off about a few comments made in May by Capt. Fire and Brimstone himself, Pat Robertson. He was quoted on ABC's "This Week" as saying:
"Over 100 years, I think the gradual erosion of the consensus that's held our country together is probably more serious than a few bearded terrorists who fly into buildings,"
He went on to reinforce his belief that: out-of-control liberal judiciary is the worst threat America has faced in 400 years - worse than Nazi Germany, Japan and the Civil War..."Yes, I really believe that," he said. "I think they are destroying the fabric that holds our nation together." - New York Daily News

It's about time moderate Christians stepped into the fray and demanded some media attention. Plus they have a sweet slogan:
Their mantra, in a building campaign against conservative Christians, a key constituency of President George W. Bush, is: "Since when was God pro-war, and pro-rich?"